Technicolor

27 Sep

I tune in for the testimony for like 3 minutes before I have to switch away, just disgusted and hopeless.  My facebook feed is intolerable.  I took my dog to get her nails trimmed and pulled up next to a car that read “I don’t believe the liberal media. I stand for the flag.”  I sighed and brought my dog in and smiled at the only other customer in the grooming shop who was the likely owner of the car/bumper sticker.  She seemed nice. It made me sad.  I know lots of nice women who don’t believe liberal media.  We have our differences, but I try to remember that politics are only a part of what make up a human.  I understand that we can coexist. That we have to coexist.

But I cannot, for the life of me, understand how a woman would not stand in solidarity with another woman who has been sexually assaulted.  I. can. not. Not only would not stand with her, but would mock her in a public forum.

Because I know that every woman on the face of the planet has been sexually harassed, sexually demeaned, or scared that they were about to be sexually assaulted multiple times in their lives.  I know it like I know the thrum of my own pulse.  Where did empathy go?  Common sense? Just basic respect for a woman as a human being? How could they do that to another woman when they too have experienced something like it?

It’s just been a shit day in this regard. I’m so sick to death of the mental gymnastics being used these days to justify the fact that we, as a collective nation, have unofficially agreed to just kinda shit all over women.

Perhaps this is dramatic.  Perhaps we are making strides and there have been good developments for women as a collective group.  But today, it doesn’t feel like.  Today, the world feels drab and dreary and gray.

In other news, a man at Aldi today was SO EXCITED about his recent doctor visit that he was practically shouting about how he was gonna go fix him up some hamburgers for dinner with his grand baby.  His cholesterol was fine!  His A1C was fine! His blood pressure was great! And that hamburger was calling his name.  He was so joyful and funny and happy about these hamburgers and sharing them with his grand baby and was telling all of us about it. Watching him celebrate this win felt like the scene in Wizard of Oz where we finally see that yellow brick road in the sea of gray.

Craig has been working like 18-20 hours a day for the past two weeks and has one more week to go. I can’t fathom how he isn’t complaining like 90% of the time, because I sure as hell would be.  But he’s not.  He just does his work and soldiers on. He comes home at like 10 at night, exhausted, and still sits on the couch and peppers me with questions about my day.  And after I’m done telling him, he retires to our dining room table to do homework for grad school. Then he slips into bed, undetected and rises at 5 am to go do it all again.  He’s the real deal.  I can’t wait til he’s done with this big work project next week and I can have him back in my life, because he is obviously an amazing person.  I want to have a campfire in the backyard to celebrate.  I want to hold hands, and drink hot chocolate and stare at a fire for a few hours, just him and me, looking straight into that technicolor glow.

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